Angelina Jolie Lips…All Day Long!

Yesterday

Woke up with my lips saying, “Read me! We’re HUGE!” 

When you look in the mirror and your lips take up more than half your face, you’re thinking,

This morning

  1. Why did I pray for Angie’s lips?
  2. Why does it hurt so much to smile?
  3. Pass the ice. These puppies are on fire.
  4. So glad it’s not my wedding day! And…
  5. What did I eat last night?

Funny thing is, when I think about my growing up years, I have so many memories of squeezing the life out of my dad’s hands as I received monthly injections for my allergy. To dust of all things. Can’t really get away from dust. And apparently, the shots kept the asthmatic reactions at bay. 

And then the shots spread out. Every other month. Then every few. And one day, the doc said, “Today’s the day! Your last allergy shot.” 

I was elated! And my dad probably appreciated that his hands would no longer bear the marks of my fingernails. 

I’m actually the least likely person to get sick in my family now, and I attribute this season of good health to all those shots. Who knows what I was injected with for all those years. I’d like to think it was some kind of super power. Like the steel in Wolverine. 

This morning, at 3:31AM, I woke up with a tingling sensation around my mouth, and all I could think, was, “Oh No! Not again!”

Stumbled over to the bathroom to look in the mirror, and there they were: My lips! You could not miss them! 

So I popped some Benadryl in hopes that a few more hours of beauty sleep would do the trick. Unfortunately, they doubled in size when I revisited the mirror at seven in the morning. Wahh!!

My oldest, awake busy getting ready for middle school, took one look at me and said, “Mangos?” 

“No!” I thought hard to make sure. “I definitely didn’t eat mangoes yesterday.”

My younger three then woke up. And I love hearing their reactions, because kids are so honest. They just say it like it is.

Sarah: “Lydia! Look at Mom’s lips! They’re so… Chunky!”

Then, Lydia: “Mom! What did you eat this time?”

Nitha, “We put some mango ice cream in the shake on Saturday. Did you drink any?”

I’m just listening to all the mini-doctors in my house while I hunt the house for more Benadryl. None.

Lovely. Now I will have to make a public appearance with these budding beauties that are not so beautiful!

When I picked up the children’s liquid Benadryl [the liquid stuff takes effect sooner,] I was tempted to just open it and chug it right there and then. 

“Be careful miss. Benadryl tends to make you drowsy.”

Cap back on. Tightly sealed, I drove home first. 

Even as I type, I feel a little frizzy. Funny. Fiddly. I mean fuzzy.

I think instead of trying to come up with some new material for a blog or writing new chapters for The Color of Tomorrow, I’ll go home, couch my whirling head, and watch the movie Hitch.

Yes, I’m into comparing myself to others to me feel better! I mean, come on, the allergic reaction Will Smith had to shrimp [I think] was insane! At least my lips haven’t totally taken over my face. Yet. Plus, I just love the movie Hitch!

As cloudy as my brain is, I rummage through the hours of yesterday and compared them to the last time I had this reaction. Was there anything similar about them? Did I eat something similar on both days?

Aleve! I took Aleve, the pain reliever, on both nights! That has to be it!

The last time was right after a dental appointment, and I remember telling hubs, I don’t need any pain meds for the aftermath of fillings. But he thought I’d wake up in pain, so he suggested I preventatively take something. I took Aleve.

Last night, I had a terrible headache. Stress related I’m sure. I’ve been frantically trying to put together a slide show and music video for my parent’s upcoming Anniversary Party this weekend, and my head was pounding by eleven last night. So hubs gave me Aleve. Eureka! 

So even though, its a little inconvenient to face the world with these fish-smackers, I’m so relieved to know exactly what I’m allergic to. 

And although I’m very much a “I don’t care what other people think” type of gal, I switched my tutoring hours to tomorrow. Because, I have to tell you, these luscious lips are distracting! And SAT students have enough trouble concentrating as it is.

I just crack up when I’m speaking to someone though, because I know they want to ask,  and they are trying so hard not to stare. 

So I just blurt it out: “About my lips…”

“Yeah! What happened?” The person jumps right into the hoop I set up.

“Botox.”

“Noooo?”

“Yeah, I’m just messing.”

The worst part of this reaction is the process of healing. All the excess fluid that drains from my lips as they shrink forms a lovely [don’t read on if you’re eating breakfast!] bubble-like blister just below my lower lip. So gross!!

The last time this happened, two days later, the bubble dried up and turned to a scab. The kind that if you apply make-up, it just screams louder, “Look at my face! There’s something there that shouldn’t be!”

Then, [don’t say I didn’t warn you!] we were sitting at Subway, eating lunch with some friends, when the dime-sized scab decided to just… fall off. [Okay, maybe it wasn’t quite as big as a dime.] I saw it on my napkin, next to the lettuce that escaped out of my sandwich. Yuck to the Yuck! I’m just glad I didn’t mistake it for an olive and pop it into my mouth!

When I excused myself to powder my nose, the mirror had me smiling! The only mark on my face was a slightly pink tinge where the scab one lay. I’d been healed! Right there in the middle of Subway! And that skinny Subway guy Jared thought he was the only one benefitting from a six-inch meatball on toasted wheat!

So, now that we’ve moved past the vomit moment in this blog, I think to myself, if I could choose one allergy, what would I pick?

 Cauliflower. Yup. That’s my allergy of choice. 

 What about you? Allergic to anything? Do you have a dream allergy?!?

 

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9 thoughts on “Angelina Jolie Lips…All Day Long!

  1. Pingback: National Honor Society “Scuberty” Mom | In Search of Waterfalls

  2. You still look lovely! I’ve been there! Mangoes give me the “corn flake lips” as my kids call it. Mangoes are one of my favorite things, though, so my husband peels and dices them and I eat them off a long fork, carefully bypassing contact with my lips. I wish you quick… ummmm… shrinkage! :-)

  3. Loved the humor, and I could totally hear the conversations between you and your daughters, coming right at me, off the screen! 😉
    But to answer your question, I definitely wish I was allergic to spinach quiche. Then I wouldn’t hurt anybody’s feelings who makes it! lol
    Miss ya and love ya, Raj!
    ~Bethany

    • Hi Bethany!

      Spinach quiche… I actually like that! But don’t worry, if you visit us in NY, I won’t serve it. How about broccoli & cheese quiche? With bacon on top? …Bacon makes everything beta! :) -Raj *hugs*

  4. Oh my! I love how you can see the comedy of it all through the embarrassment! Aleve of all things! I had an allergy to bees/mosquitoes. I don’t know if i still have it though…haven’t been stung in a while. :) Now we can definitely *not* be envious of Angelina Jolie. :) Feel better!!!
    http://www.munchtalk.net

    • Thanks Jasanna :) ! Bees and mosquitoes are two of my least favorite things in the world!! Just hoping my lips return to normal before this weekend!! Getting there…Icing even now! -Raj